I woke up Mother’s Day weekend with a pulsing in my left leg, a constant, irritating pain. I tried all my pain relief go-to’s but nothing really helped to calm it down.
I took my mom out to lunch on Mother’s Day and I struggled to sit there without expressing the pain in my body.
The ache took over.
My mom noticed. I know she understands pain too.
Out of control
When I got back home, I cried in frustration, sadness and overwhelm. The ache in my leg was exhausting and nothing was helping it to feel better.
It felt out of control.
While I’m sure that this new pain was an after effect of pulling out my lower back two months ago, I couldn’t help but correlate it with energetics of the root and sacral chakra spaces and deeper soul lessons I’ve learned over the past year.
The pain showed up on my left side from my glutes, down to my calves. The left side of the body connects energetically to the feminine, mother line.
It’s interesting to me that this pain in my left leg showed up physically in a super painful way on Mother’s Day, a day that has for years served as a painful reminder that I’m not a mom (outside of being a doggie mom to my two beautiful boxers).
I understand now that the reality of this is ultimately out of my control.
Repeating soul lessons
When I asked for further guidance on the painful pulsing in my leg, I was reminded of underlying subconscious beliefs on control, safety and my soul’s yearning for protection from further loss.
Protection and safety are characteristics of the root chakra space.
Given what I know about past trauma in my own life, and from all the women before me, it makes sense that this showed up for me on Mother’s Day.
We have a powerful connection to the mother line. Ancestral energy holds imprints of the women before you, and as women we have endured so much.
Releasing old patterns
After being witness to my struggle on Mother’s Day, my mom offered to pay for me to go see a gal named Bri who has helped her with the pain in her body.
I was grateful that she offered to help.
Bri does what’s called PUSH Therapy, which incorporates Tension Release Therapy, to restore chronically tight muscles and joints to eliminate the source of tension and pain patterns in your body.
These negative patterns can arise from repetitive use, poor posture habits, weak muscles or previous injury.
To correct, the therapist trains your muscles in a way that supports your entire structure by “connecting” your core muscles to your upper and lower body.
Constant state of flex
Bri reviewed the state of my posture and could tell right away that I had lots of issues going on. My lower back has a slight curve to it, even more so since I pulled it out a couple of months ago.
She explained how the state of my body was causing an inwards collapse, putting pressure on my lower back and pelvis, which lacked the space needed for a healthy muscular and nervous system response.
She could see simply by how I laid flat on the table, that the muscles in my lower back and pelvis are not relaxed. They’re in a state of constant flex and resulting decreased blood flow.
“It’s a protective mechanism,” Bri explained.
It’s time to let go.
My body reminded me of the message that returns again and again when I address these deep physical and emotional aches.
It’s time to let go.
It was the same message I’d received on Mother’s Day when I asked my angels and guides about my pulsing left leg.
You are safe and protected. It’s OK now to let go.
I laid down in different positions on the treatment table, fully clothed, as Bri dug her elbow in all the sore spots in my body.
She dug deep into the the pain in my pelvic bowl, deep in the corners of my hips.
It hurt so good.
On the Positive Side?
With Bri’s help, my muscles are being re-trained to release old patterns of pain and to support my core and root, so these areas have space to breathe and flow.
I hope the pulsing leg pain serves as a sign that the energy’s ready to move out of me, so I can continue to heal and move forward.
With proper energy flow the pain should continue out my feet and down into the healing roots of Mother Earth.
I understand now that even though I haven’t been blessed with the “Mom” title, I can still stimulate this motherly energy of creation, unconditional love and protection.
I appreciate my mom for reminding me of this. I’m grateful that she recognized the pain and offered up help.
There’s a beautiful intermingling on the same treatment table as we both seek release and peace needed for true healing in the mother line.
It’s time to allow and nurture this divine feminine part of me, an energy that’s all about receiving, releasing and simply being.
This is what I continue to work on, as these lessons on surrender show up again and again…
Have you seen this lesson show up in your life too? What do you need to let go of? Have you tried hands on therapies that help to release the tension in your muscles?
I’d love to hear from you in the comment section below.